Breaking Barriers: Counseling for Late Diagnosed Autism or ADHD

You have tried self-help books and listened to podcasts. You have gone to therapy multiple times, have tried various medications and supplements with limited success.

Despite your best efforts, you still face difficulties in your relationships. Suddenly, there's an “ah ha” moment that previous therapy was missing a key element. The depression, anxiety, and trauma were connected to being neurodivergent!

Ready to experience neurodivergent affirming therapy?

Schedule a free 20-minute video consultation with me to see how I can help. Fill out a contact form, and I'll email you to set it up. (no phone call required). I provide one on one online counseling in 38 states across the US.

This is not just a clinical focus for me; it's also something i have lived through as well. I've seen firsthand how understanding my own neurodivergence has not only positively affected my life but has also been life changing for my spouse, who is autistic/ADHD, and our two neurospicy kids.

Common Issues We Bring to Therapy

Being neurodivergent we often struggle to make and keep friends.

We put a lot of effort to fit in and be liked, but no matter how hard we try we don’t seem to develop deep friendships.

We rehearse conversations before we go out, trying to plan out what they will say and how to respond to it.

After the conversation we overanalyze what we said, often feeling shame and embarrassment.

We are Highly Sensitive

We get migraines from bright lights or smelling perfume.

Our clothes have to be comfortable. We know what we like and what we don’t. Tags and seams in socks suck!

We experience the emotions of others so intensely that they feel like they are our own.

When we get rejected it brings significant emotional pain.

We have a lot of physical health concerns that interrupt our lives and doctors have a hard time diagnosing them.

Tasks that seem effortless for others require so much energy and effort

We have difficulty getting organized. We come up with all these new systems but aren’t able to keep them going.

We hate making phone calls and it takes so much to get us to actually make doctors appointments.

People call us “lazy” or tell us that we just “need to try harder” when we are putting in a lot of effort.

We Feel a Sense of Restlessness

There's a constant urge to move or do something. We feel guilty when we rest and relax.

Our mind is constantly buzzing with various ideas and things we want to do. However, we often don’t follow through with them. (People like to point this out to us)

We Get Distracted

We lose our phone or keys often. I can’t tell you how many times I make myself coffee and forget where I put it.

We sometimes have to ask people to repeat what they said because there was background noise or our mind was wandering when they were talking.

It’s difficult to focus on a task for too long. We start projects and stop in the middle of them to start something new. Nothing gets competed.

Suddenly Everything Makes Sense!

How did I not know this before?

How did others not see this?

Realizing you are ADHD, autistic, or both later in life can be overwhelming, stirring a range of emotions—shock, anger, grief, and joy. You are entering a whole new realm of information and possibilities.

Feeling overwhelmed?

Sick of reading and ready to start making changes in your life? Let's walk through it together.

  • Schedule a free 20-minute video consultation with me. Fill out a contact form, and I'll email you to set it up—no phone call required.

What does neurodivergent affirming therapy look like?

Exploring the potential of being ADHD, autistic, or both, therapy may involve...

  • Revisiting your childhood history, examining your interpersonal relationships, sensory sensitivities, communication styles, educational experiences, and emotion regulation.

    • This involves addressing the impact, and potentially trauma, of being neurodivergent without anyone recognizing it.

  • We can use various tests and conduct structured clinical interviews to better understand your experience. While I do categorize this as a "official assessment," it does not constitute a neuropsychological assessment. If you are seeking the latter, I have a network of trusted colleagues who do.

    • It's crucial to emphasize that, in my perspective, undergoing "official" testing is not a prerequisite for identifying as neurodivergent. I believe that self-diagnosis is a valid and legitimate means of acknowledging your neurodivergent identity.

  • Once we figure out how being neurodivergent does or doesn’t relate to you, we'll make a plan to help you reach your goals in life.

Discovered you are neurodivergent and want to navigate what that means for the future ...

  • We'll delve deeper to understand the internalized messages, negative self-talk, and potential trauma that emerged from growing up not knowing you are neurodivergent.

  • Together, we can explore ways to adapt the world to better suit you instead of trying to fit into neurotypical standards. You will be surprised how by making little changes can make such a huge impact.

  • You can gain insights into why certain tasks or situations have been challenging, offering solutions for a more manageable, peaceful, and even happier life.

  • Fine tune your ability to identify and communicate your emotions. This skill can pave the way for more rewarding and fulfilling relationships.

  • Learn how to show more of your true self to others by slowly letting go of your mask. It's rewarding when people connect with the real you, rather than the person you think they want you to be.

  • Discover ways to connect with fellow neurodivergent individuals. It's comforting to no longer feel alone and to be a part of a community that truly understands and accepts you.

As a neurodivergent therapist, supporting clients through this process is an honor. My life has improved a lot since I gained insight into my neurotype and how it affects me every day, and I'm excited for you to experience that too.

Although it may feel overwhelming initially, having a guide through this process can be incredibly helpful.

Having come through the other side of the journey, I can assure you that it does indeed get better.

I offer online counseling so you are able to feel more comfortable doing therapy in your own space. No concerns about traffic, locating a building, or taking time away from work or family. Simply hop on the video, and we can begin our session.

Schedule a free 20 minute consultation to see how I can help (no phone call needed).

Why does this matter?

Having a neurodivergent-affirming perspective in therapy can profoundly shape its direction.

For example, effectively managing ADHD/autistic burnout requires a different approach compared to addressing depression.

  • In the case of depression, therapists often suggest engaging with others, soaking up sunlight, exercising, and moving the body.

  • Conversely, for someone experiencing burnout, the recommendation might involve distancing from people, laying in bed with a weighted blanket, prioritizing rest, and replenishing energy.

  • These strategies stand in stark contrast. Applying techniques designed for depression to a neurodivergent person could potentially exacerbate their condition. This not only proves ineffective but may also contribute to a sense of failure, compounding the existing challenges.

Are you still in the research and reading phase or not ready to start therapy?

No problem, I got you there too! To save you from countless hours of searching I created a resource page with all the critical information on ADHD and Autism in Adults. This page is a self help guide which covers navigating friendships, family, and romantic relationships, the challenges of being a neurodivergent parent, along with valuable tips for emotion regulation, enhancing motivation, developing a sensory regulation plan, parenting advice, and guidance on requesting accommodations at work. You name it, it's all there!

When you're ready to discuss and process the information with someone, feel free to circle back, and I'll be glad to help out.

Still have some questions?

  • I actively participate in our conversations and may offer suggestions on where to begin. However, I prioritize letting you guide the session and determining which topics are most important for us to process together. If you require significant structure and want someone to tell you what to do I am not the therapist for you. In such cases, exploring the services of a coach could be a more fitting option

  • While the research on the effectiveness of therapy suggests that weekly sessions are best, I acknowledge that it may not be feasible for everyone. I find that some people can make significant changes attending therapy at least every other week. However, there are instances where weekly therapy is required.

  • Our sessions will be 50 - 53 minutes long.

  • Unfortunately, to make substantial progress, it's necessary to attend therapy at least every other week. However, for current or past clients who have achieved their therapy goals and desire ongoing support, I provide monthly check-ins to help them stay on track.

  • Sorry, I only offer virtual sessions.

  • I don't accept insurance, but I can provide a 'superbill' for documentation. If you have out-of-network benefits, you can submit it to your insurance for potential reimbursement

  • My neurodivergent support groups mostly consists of my past or current clients. However, if you already have an individual therapist, I'm more than willing to meet with them, along with you, to assess whether either group would be suitable for your needs.